Cher, Mel, and I laughed all the way to her house. At What? I couldn't tell you but it was hella funny at the time! We at a quick snack unpacked enough to ogle the clothes we all brought/had and started to primp for dinner, the game, and the club to celebrate Mellie Mel's BDay in style. We got all pimpled out, me in my leather pants and shirt and headed to Icon Grill, for Crack N Cheese. We swear they put Crack in their Mac N Cheese because why else do I feel the need to eat it at least twice when I'm there even though I know I will be horribly stopped up when I get back to LA? Anyway the food and the drinks were flowing freely even though our waitress was a grumpy hot mess. I had three Orange Drops which were oh so yummy and if you had of told me it was 35 degrees outside I would have laughed in your face and then probably fell down.
We all got a nice foundation buzz which I had planned to temper with the carbs from the macaroni but something was conspiring against me. I teeter tottered on Jev's arm in my 5.5 inch boots to the car and poured myself in. Off to the game well first we had to find parking. Unfortunately, we had to walk and walk and walk to the arena....oh my toes and ankle! Finally we arrive to the Team Store where I do a SuperStar a la Mary Katherine...oooh jeez that sucks luckily I'm a hot girl so I can get away with those moves...plus it was raining. I put on my best indignant face and pronounced someone really should dry this floor and put some mats down and stomped off....risking another fall...Oh Ebbie!
Walking to the seats I fall again almost taking Jev with me. Same move but I feel my leather pants getting bigger, now I remember why I don't wear them very often. They are smokin when you first put them on but loosen as the night wears on! We finally arrive at the seats a little bruised, still buzzed but ready for some fun. The teams take the floor and we proceed to forget that a game is even happening. There is so much laughter and joking plus more drinks. I do know that the Sonics lost to the Celtics and I remember clapping a few times and ducking Squatch but that's the extent of it. By the time the game was over Mel and I were starving luckily we had our leftover Crack N Cheese but NO FRIGGIN FORKS. That did not stop us we wrapped it up like a sandwich and got our grub on......It? Was Still Good Cold!
On to the club! First again, parking issues. Damn downtown Seattle! We walk....UPHILL; me still in my hookerboots with semi healed ankle and tight leather pants. The club was slightly empty the buffet we were promised was sorely missed but that did not stop my double peach vodka and cranberry...YUM; and then the double jack and coke, and then the chocolate cake shot, and then the long island, and then the other long island, and then the long island with champagne mixed in....
Oh Boy! As we drank the sheninigans ensued. At one point Jev attempted to cut me off that didn't work too well, I shamelessly crawled ON the bar...yes you read right ON the bar and asked the bartender what I could get for 10 bucks which is all Jev would let me have. That's how I ended up with a Long Island; a drink I haven't had since college. Then I knocked Mellie's beer on the floor...sorry birthday girl! We tried to clean it up but Cher's purse spilled too which resulted in her stuff being put back in her purse plus some broken beer bottle! But then Rosie from the Jetsons aka the Waitress swooped in with her mini broom and pan and helped us out.
Then Cher spilled my Long Island, the Long Island I had to pimp myself out for and bought me another one so it was all good but she bought herself one too....ooops! At that time the Sonics and Celts were in the house and one of the Celts bought us a bottle of champagne which was not the kind I drink but I didn't want to waste it so Cher and I had Champagne in our Long Islands...That? Was the beginning of the end. It was all downhill from there and the club was almost closed but we were not ready to end the party.....sigh! Cher and I wandered outside so Cher could get a smoke end and we met two midgets well not actual midgets if that were the case Cher and I would have run but two very short guys. One was rambling on and on about how beautiful I was and how he can't find any real niggas to roll with then he pulled out a fad wad of hundred dollar bills which made me wish to God I was one of those Gully Broads I always hear about in New York or the South because the whole posse could have had a shopping spree on Ebbie and Cher! But we were too drunk and too prissy to execute ANY plan...so we just left. And he looked shocked we rolled out but I did wave Bye Bye!
When we got back in it was almost time to go but I felt a bigger buzz coming on if that was even possible. By the end of the night Cher and I were singing the soundtrack to Dreamgirls and when we ran out of songs we knew from that movie we moved on to The Whiz we sang Home LOUD and BAD gurgling through the words we didn't know and tried to walk down the hill together. Jev's friend from school was there I remember giving him a hug but then I went cross eyed and that was that.
Mel decided to stay at her guy friend's house and bravely left us alone in her house. I was starving, I needed some grease really to calm me but this was Bellevue and aint shit open late there! I tried to peel a tangerine but was too drunk, I tried to open a box of triscuits...too drunk for that too! Jevvie made veggie patties and stunk up the house with the smell of broccoli, there was some mention of lemon tarts but I had passed out by then...I did wake up enough to puke but the next day was waaaaay rough.
Mel and I managed to make it through the day, we briefly took a trip to the mall where we went to Sephora and I redeemed some more worthless Beauty Insider points. My free gifts this time? A Barbie Sized lip gloss and BeneTint. After I get through the end of Fiscal Year Sephora is soooo getting a long letter from me....a long letter! Anyhoo, we picked up our goodies; Jevon redeemed his anniversary certificate for some sexy guy smell good and we bounced with a promise to return in a few days. It was time to hit to the road to Tacoma; Washington's answer to Comptom. Surprisingly, Tacoma is going through a re-org there was a bunch of cute restaurants we hit up the Crown Bar swearing not to drink. We are so undisciplined! Cher ordered a drink with many colorful layers I asked her what it was and she answered a bad idea; I sipped a Mojito while Mellie's version of not drinking was a beer! Jev was the only abstainer with Big Dre. We had many laughs; braved the cold in search of a karaoke bar (unsuccessful, thank God because that definitely would have required more drinking), and ate really well.
After we dropped Cher off, her phone rang in the car.....Her IPhone. I am a Computer Scientist and it took three unsuccessful tries for me to answer it. USC is SOOOOO asking for their degrees back. We swung a U and dropped off her phone and headed back to the city to sleep in. Mel and I did something good for our bodies and headed to the gym for a pre-funk workout which was cool. I did major ab work and had sore abs for a week; just in time for series II pole dancing....Sweet! I made my famous stuffed turkey burgers for Mellie and Jev, we watched Bowfinger giggled and went to sleep!
The next game we had another game and the promise of tater tots and corn dogs at McMinimons; for some reason they were deathly crowded and I almost missed out on my fave place. But I scored a table well actually outwalked a family and plunked down in a seat. They shot us dagger looks the rest of the evening but oh well. We did pay attention to the game this time but Mel and I sadly discovered we had forgotten our bank cards in our other party purses which cut down on our capacity to drink so we made plans to grab them at the house where I changed into some closed toe ho heels because I was suffering from frost bite by this time in my strappy sandals :-(. We headed to Joey's which is another fave of mine in the PacNorWest and I warmed up with a Strawberry Lemonade followed by several super stoked vodka and cokes. A very pretty but dangerous concotion of coke and vanilla vodka with alcohol slushie suspended in the middle flavored with black cherry.......yum!
Jev's friend joined us for dinner and lots of merriment ensued and then I fell down in the elevator because I was drunk because of the yumminess of the vodka and coke. We ordered them like free refills. Somehow we made it home and I passed out again....this is becoming a habit.
Oh New Year's Eve is here its almost time to go.....Mel and I hit up the mall I got my toes done, Mel got some color at the tanning salon....Jev slept and watched football. We packed up to go to the hotel for NYE. We arrived at the hotel and Mel's car would not start at Valet.......D'Oh! I ran to the W and got there charger and Jev did his magic. Turns out it was just the battery so that ended our sadness...Yaaaay!
We went to a sushi bar for colorful drinks that sounded good in theory but tasted like cough syrup upon execution but the sushi was good. We headed out to the game all glizted up for NYE. The game was fun and we headed out to change clothes and jam to GameWerks. Wow unlimited video games in a cocktail dress and heels.....That? Was loads of fun! We played drunk dance revolution, took an ole school ghetto pic and had a ball. I had my favorite GameWerks drink.....Zombies...Yum! But didn't turn into one.
After that, we hunted down a cab (Impossible) and headed to find food. McDonald's should have charged a cover for the drive through. We ditched the golden arches for IHOP which was ridiculous. We tried to steal a table but were caught but not thrown out. I got my pancakes and we tried to get a cab home...holy crap. Luckily a cabbie was dropping off and picked us up. We quickly changed clothes, packed our bags and headed to the airport where I passed out again! It took all of my energy to appear sober so they would let me board the plane. I slept to LA, on the way to the game and then fell asleep for a whole quarter of the game...WOW!!!! But SC won and my Trojans made me happy so it was the cherry on top of the Super Stoked Vodka and Coke! Yaaay
Happy New Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
